Leadership and other monsters

In this little article, I want to make you think and encourage you to laugh at my leadership lessons. It’s summer, most people are thinking about vacation and dreading work.

This article was originally published on finsurtech.ai where I provide unfiltered insights into leadership, innovation and the future of the insurance industry.

I’ve been leading teams for over two decades and have seen the good, the bad and the ugly. The following list is just a collection of demystified corporate phrases. Don’t take them (too) seriously.

Take everything with a grain of salt and enjoy the sarcasm.

Not everything is great

I once had a colleague who reacted to everything with the same word: “Great.”

A project was delivered on time? Great.

A product that flopped? Great.

People who cried in the bathroom? Still great.

That was not optimism. It was denial wrapped up in corporate jargon. And it didn’t take long for me to realize that his “praise” was hollow – just like the mood around us. The company had big problems. Very big ones, in fact.

Toxic positivity is not a leadership quality. It’s gaslighting with a smile.

People are not stupid – they realize when something is wrong. Pretending otherwise is not inspiring, but insults their intelligence.

Real leadership does not mean sugarcoating things. It means saying: “This is difficult and we will tackle it together.”

Culture check: Run, Forrest, run.

In my first month in a new job, I attended a meeting with the CEO to talk about fundraising. A colleague I admired – sharp, confident, usually very outspoken – suddenly changed. Her tone became flat, her posture stiffened and she began to make defensive statements.

No one had questioned her. Nevertheless, she began to justify herself.

At that moment, I knew something was wrong.

When people automatically go on the defensive, it has nothing to do with their performance. It has to do with the culture. And when fear sets the tone, trust has no chance.

You can’t develop courageous strategies in a culture of fear.

Control is not leadership. Trust is leadership.

We are a family here

“We are a family here.”

Have you ever heard this at work?

That’s funny, because real families don’t fire you during the budget phase.

They do not “restructure” you out of the company.

And they definitely don’t just let you disappear after years of loyalty.

Let’s be honest: a company is not your family. It’s an economic arrangement.

You give your time, your skills and your energy. You receive money, benefits and (ideally) respect.

You can get involved, work together, even make friends – but you’re not there out of unconditional love.

They are there to do a job. They are there to get paid.

I already have a family.

What I need is a workplace that treats me like an adult – pays me fairly, sets clear boundaries and doesn’t use belonging as a weapon.

Because true belonging is not based on feelings of guilt.

It is based on common goals, mutual respect and the freedom to leave – without shame.

Analysis paralysis: The Executive Edition

It took us six months to make a trivial decision. Six bloody months.

We needed ten steering committees. After each committee, someone rolled their eyes and demanded yet another analysis.

The Operations and Finance departments were running around like headless chickens, breaking SQL to create reports and slides that no one would read.

Meanwhile, a few modest junior staff – three levels down in the organizational structure – quietly held the whole thing together.

The problem? Not the data. Not the analysis.

What was missing was courage – the courage to act without absolute certainty.

The Prince Charming didn’t wait for a steering committee. He turned up, lost his sword, improvised – and still did his job. Leadership is not about perfect plans. It’s about being there when it matters – with or without a sword.

People are not PowerPoint slides.

That was obviously a shock.

How does that happen? They are full-time employees. Cost centers. Resources. Assets.

At least that’s how the highly paid consultants saw it.

They came to cut costs and “create synergies”, benchmarked us mercilessly – and reduced people to a number in a table.

What did they overlook? There were people behind these numbers.

Mothers. Carers. Single parents. People who keep teams – and families – together.

You say people are your greatest asset? That’s great. Then act like it.

Create safe spaces. Listen to them. Pay fairly. Promote according to values, not politics.

Because people are not items on a balance sheet.

You are your company.

The Rockstar CEO

The “rock star CEO” had it all – the limelight, the headlines, the self-importance.

Big speeches. Even bigger ego. Always the center of attention. He loved to say “we” when everything was going well and “you” when things weren’t going so well.

But companies are not built by rock stars.

They are built by bands – chaotic, brilliant, often overlooked bands. The real work takes place behind the scenes. In late-night Slack messages. In silent problem solving. In people who come to work every day without expecting a standing ovation.

The best leaders I’ve met don’t need a microphone. They know that leadership is not a show – it’s a commitment.

So please spare me the glitzy keynotes and the perfectly curated LinkedIn profiles. Show me the team.

Because that’s where the real story takes place.

The savior, the star, the ultimate god

Um, another one.

Imagine a room full of experts deep in discussion and sharing their knowledge.

And the CEO – the self-proclaimed savior, star and ultimate god – throws “challenging” questions into the round to show how knowledgeable he is.

People nod politely. No one dares to say what they think:

“Man, we’re working here. If you want to show off, there’s another room for that.”

The best managers I know don’t fight for the microphone. They pass it on.

They don’t have to be the smartest people in the room – they have undergone therapy and realized that they no longer have anything to prove. Instead, they create spaces in which others can shine.

If your success story starts with “I” and ends with “me”, maybe it’s time to retire.

The

These are not theories. These are lived experiences – some sharp, some funny, all real.

Leadership today is not about perfection. It’s about awareness, courage and just enough humility to remain human.

And if you can laugh at the same time? All the better.

No dragons were harmed in the making of these lessons – but a few egos suffered a little.

Mirela Dimofte

Listen and read also: thebrokernews Podcast Episode 9: With Brigitte Roy and Thomas Gassenbauer from Cognizant about new leadership qualities